Letting go - life balance is possible

“The Tao Te Ching says, When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. When I let go of what I have, I receive what I need. Have you ever struggled to find work or love, only to find them after you have given up? This is the paradox of letting go. Let go, in order to achieve. Letting go is God’s law.”

Mary Manin Morrissey

18 months ago I began my journey to create an online inspirational self-improvement portal for women (conscioulsyfemale.com). I was new to online and I had no idea of how much time, effort and commitment a project like this would take. Instead of starting small and growing the project (this would have been the wise move – great thing to observe in retrospect!), I adopted a multinational mindset and wanted to give a comprehensive offering to the world. This demanded a dedicated approach - so much so that it almost took over every single part of my life.

• I invested all of my money into it
• I invested all of my time into studying, designing, growing it
• I invested all of my creativity into it
• I invested everything...

The challenge that I faced, like any other workaholic (gosh, did I really admit that!),  is that I became completely ‘addicted’ to this way of doing and being. When this happens it is often so difficult to let go. (Isn’t it interesting how we become addicted to things – even when they don’t give us what we need)

I am a Capricorn, mountain goat which means that when I become completely focused on achieving a goal, I am guilty of forgetting to look up to assess what is unfolding around me. Eighteen months ago I was living a life that was overflowing with creativity and joy. The labour of love has taken over – it has moved in to each and every part of my life.

It has been essential for me to de-rail. I needed to take time, step back, review and look at my life form a completely new perspective (this is what my life makeover days and 1:1 sessions offer my clients). Its time to gently reclaim my creative life again. (I’m so excited about this)

My inspirational life balance plan is in progress and unraveling beautifully. After only a few short weeks, my new life is beginning to take seed. One or two fundamental changes in my mindset have made way for a much more meaningful experience of life.

Natalie (my assistant) has helped to inspire me. I am so fortunate to have her in my life – she has been giving me links to many websites, courses and ideas that she knew would make me glow from the inside out. I have embraced them all with two hands and the fruits will be apparent in the coming months.

Here is a glimmer of the mindset that I had subconsciously created to ensure that my business would succeed. I almost feel embarrassed writing it down.

Old thinking structures – oh dear!

• Work 12 hours each day to get CF up and running.
• Don’t focus on making money until CF is perfect.
• I  don’t want to market CF until it is perfect.
• CF must be an impressive portal, one of the best in the world.
• Work comes first as it’s my purpose – service is everything in my life.
• I have done too much work to step back from CF and take care of my financial needs.
• Create (100) products to create multiple passive income streams.
• I must be involved in each and every single part of the brand.
• I need to know all about marketing on the internet.
• I need to know all about Search Engine Optimisation.
• I need to know all about data capture.
• I need to know all about affiliate marketing online.
• In my spare time I must study.
• I need to do it alone. I don’t want an investor.
• I can have a balanced life when website is complete.
• I must serve others and make changes in the world – especially the UK.

This old way of thinking would have killed me. It was tough, focused, unforgiving and although fulfilling on some levels – it was blocking me from living my most inspiring, very best life. When I de-railed, I took the time to review and change my old thinking. It was painful, however, very quickly doors began to swing open into a new amazing way of being...

Here are some mind maps of my new dreams and ways of thinking. I love using images, colour and creativity. I prefer this to making to do lists. Maybe you could do something similar? Do you need to re-assess?

My new ‘living life to the full’ mindset...

• I deserve to have a life that is filled with joy – a life outside my service and purpose.
• I deserve to have a creativity filled life (buying and selling antiques, photography, writing).
• I deserve to spend money on fun things – I don’t need to invest all my money in the business.
• I can easily make time work in the community to do voluntary work once per month.
• I take the time to do my photo/blog.
• I am now open to seeing 10 coaching clients per week – I allow the abundance to flow towards me.
• I am now open up to new friendships in Edinburgh.
• I now create magical themed dinner/hot tub parties.
• Treat myself to a macro lens for my digital camera.
• Treat myself to a wonderful weekly yoga class to drive to in the countryside.
• Adventure on Saturday picnics with camera to new places (check out maps/make a plan).
• Treat myself to doing 5 Rhythms Dance classes in Edinburgh once per month.
• Begin to think about giving up the Audi Convertible and buy a ‘Frenchy’ type car.
• Dream about the idea of training to become a Gabrielle Roth, 5 rhythms teacher?
• Begin to think about training to do breath/bodywork.
• Design and create a spectacular ‘beachy’summer house.
• Design and build the ‘beachy’ garden.
• Buy beautiful things and re-sell on Etsy for fun!
• Photograph beautiful products for resale on Etsy.
• Treat myself to trips to Europe. Shop at flea markets in Paris then resell on Etsy.
• Allow myself to blog about life, creativity, spirituality and photography…
• Allow a business manager to run CF.
• Open up to investors for CF.

Myabe it's time for you to re-assess?